13 August 2011

An Open Letter to Harold Camping

[Originally published 19 May 2011]
Dear Mr. Camping,
It has come to my attention that you and your fellow freaks of nature have been peddling the notion that the world will end this Saturday, May 21st.  Even though your attempts to justify your claim are laughable, I find that simply laughing at you and calling you obscene names – enjoyable though that is – just isn’t enough.
So, Harold Camping, I dare you to put your money where your mouth is.
If the world really does end according to your prediction, then I will:
  1. publicly endorse you as a messiah,
  2. accept the one true God as my personal God, and
  3. willingly commit my soul to Hell for all eternity, to make room for one more in Heaven.
For an anti-theist like me, I hope you’ll agree that that’s a major commitment.
If, on the other hand, the world just keeps on running, then you owe me everything you have.  Everything.  Every dollar, every car, every stick of furniture, every candy bar in your pantry, every bible you have will belong to me.
That’s the dare.  Are you sufficiently committed to your beliefs to take it?
Or are you just another coward, like all the other losers in your sad and pathetic cult?

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